Here in Ontario it is called Simcoe Day, in honor of Lord Simcoe, the founder of Ontario.
There wasn’t really a “Lord” Simcoe, his name was John Graves Simcoe, and he founded York, which is now the city of Toronto.
He was the first lieutenant governor of Upper Canada, which is now Ontario. He introduced many institutions including courts, trial by jury and English Common Law . . .
WHO CARES?!?!
It’s a long weekend man! Just grab some Heineken, bags of chips, and
P A R T Y!
History is important – to historians. Long summer weekends were meant to chill out by the pool, BBQ, drinking beer – or anything alcoholic – and just forgetting about that awful thing called life.
Life isn’t so bad – so long as you take time to enjoy it’s finer pleasures.
Like drinking. Drinking can be loads of fun, there is so much to choose from. Beers, scotch, whiskey, cocktails, mocktails . . .
MOCKTAILS?!?!
What are you 12?
Here’s your Shirley Temple. . .pussy!
Where was I?
Oh yeah. . . the finer things in life.
Like food!
Glorious goodies like double chocolate fudge cake, dripping in soft butter cream icing, topped with whipped cream and hot fudge sauce.
MMMMMMMM cake!
Though sometimes, the finest thing in life is to sit back, and do absolutely nothing at all. Be it soaking up some rays at the pool, lounging around on the balcony, or lying on the couch mindlessly watching some infomercial on television.
So, “Lord” John Graves Simcoe founded Toronto in 1793 and named it York . . .
WAIT A SEC. . .
HISTORY?!?!
AGAIN!
Who cares about stinking history? So long as you can celebrate the holiday in peace and quiet, light off a few fireworks, drink your Heinekin and eat your chips.
Remember the key word . . .
P A R T Y!
But just in case you’re interested, here’s a snippet of why we do celebrate Simcoe Day in Ontario – for those who really want to know:
John Graves Simcoe
Born February 25, 1752 in Cotterstock, England
Educated at Eton College, Merton College, Oxford (THE SAME GUYS WHO WRITE THE DICTIONARY.
Occupations: Military Officer, First Lieutenant Govenor of Upper Canada.
Spouse: Elizabeth Posthuma Gwillim
Parents: Captain John Simco, Katherine Simcoe
Children: Francis Gwillim Simcoe, Eliza Simcoe, Henry Addington Simcoe
Died: October 26, 1806 in Exeter, England
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